Well, it's been little more than a week since my last entry but a lot has happened since then.
I'll start with the good, because I have decided to post this journal in chronological order. Well, last Monday I skipped school and went to Jasper with my cousin Sean, his girlfriend, his dad and all his sister's except one, as well as my other cousin's feonce and daughter. That trip was great fun, we hiked to the top of the mountain and took some nice pictures.
The rest of the week went on, moderately uneventful except for very frequent arguements, disagreements and the such with my boyfriend. Friday came with 3 hours of slappin' pizzas at my part-time job, and a fight with my boyfriend/co-worker ensued. It was inevitable really, but he had no reasonable excuse to be treating me the way he was, and in his own ignorance failed to realise he had hurt me. I was glad to leave work and to see I wouldn't be working with him for a week, and my mother, whom I was currently in dispute with, picked me up from work. We drove uptown to the Mountain Steak and Pizza to meet with several family members in honour of Sean leaving for God knows how long back East. 26 of us gathered and ate together, as a family. Another thing worth noting is that my 15 year old cousin from BC was there, and staying in town, but only for the night. The supper went very well, and after that I hitched a ride to my aunty Happy's with my uncle. Some time later my mother and younger siblings arrived and we took part in a traditional game of Ball Tag (around the block.) The time came for my family to depart, but i was convinced I was staying the night, and my mother reluctantly agreed. Soon after, Sean and his girlfriend left. The next morning at 7:15a.m. they returned, to deliver one last goodbye and a farewell hug. We did not say "goodbye", but we said "So long," as our wise and respected grandfather has taught us to do so. My heart cried, but my eyes did not tear and my physical needs drew me back to bed for 5 more hours sleep. We awoke to my Uncle bringing us "brekky in bed". It was a thoughtful thing to do, and I was thankful. We spent the remainder of the day with the Grade Sevener, Taylor T. and since we were in a good mood, spent our time together laughing, making jokes, and inventing stories from our minds' creative imaginations.
Before going to bed that night I spent a fair amount of time with one of my greatest friends, Anna, and her very good looking boyfriend, Skye. However, my uncle, out of anger cut the phone cord and prematurely ended our conversation at 12 midnight. I went to bed, sadly knowing I wouldn't verbally communicate with Anna for a week and a half, she would be having fun in Disneyland. The next day was the worst in a long time.
One little MSN conversation quickly turned into an angry outburst of things only uttered when you are truely upset. My closest cousin erupted on me with hate on her lips and self-pity in her heart. I am mildly bothered by the way she acted, as I know now it was not my fault, however what she said unto me led me to tears, crying for the first time in a while, for at least 2 hours. Saying I was upset is an understatement. The details of why, are not important. I do not know why I am sharing this with random people, although I am nearly certain no one shall read these words.
I can only hope that things will turn for the better, and everything will go back to normal. Anna and I will be friends, Melina won't wonder why I am ignoring her, I'll be able to look at my cousin without my heart saddening. But I know that cannot be. I know that I walk the hallways with sadness on my face, but I will not tell of why I am this way. My friends can only wonder what I am feeling right now, but they will never know indefinately.
A select few know the details of this situation, some have made me feel better, some have only worsened it. Maybe, just maybe, if outside influence can convince my cousin to change her mind and discover that she has hurt me so bad, maybe things can be better and the relationship of everyone affected will remain intact.
Only time...can tell...